Escape to Paradise: Unbelievable Fishing at Greenfield Valley!
Escape to Paradise: Unbelievable Fishing at Greenfield Valley! – A Wildly Honest Review (Prepare for Rambling!)
Okay, buckle up buttercups, because I just got back from Escape to Paradise: Unbelievable Fishing at Greenfield Valley! and I’m… well, I’m still processing. This isn’t your sterile, perfectly-curated travel blog; this is the real, messy, sometimes-hilarious truth. And yes, I’m going to cover everything, even the things you probably wouldn’t think to ask. So, let's dive in, shall we?
First off, let's get this straight: Accessibility is a mixed bag. I saw wheelchair accessibility mentioned, but truth be told, navigating some of the grounds felt a little dicey. Some paths were a bit rough around the edges. They do have an elevator, thank the lord, and I saw ramps in places, but I'd call it "making an effort" rather than flawlessly accessible.
Cleanliness and Safety: Alright, I'm a bit of a germaphobe, so this was HUGE for me. They REALLY took it seriously during my visit. Anti-viral cleaning products, daily disinfection in common areas, and professional-grade sanitizing services gave me serious peace of mind. You know, the kind that lets you actually enjoy vacation, not just worry about catching something. Room sanitization opt-out? Nice touch. Hand sanitizer was everywhere. And I saw staff constantly cleaning and disinfecting. Honestly? Well done. They were doing their best, and it showed.
Rooms: Okay, let's talk about my room. I went for the full shebang: air conditioning (essential!), Wi-Fi [free] (more on that later), a mini bar (yes!), and a separate shower/bathtub, because…well, why not? The blackout curtains were my best friend; I slept like a log. The bed was comfy. The desk was perfect for pretending to work (while actually daydreaming). And the hair dryer – a lifesaver! The bathroom had toiletries, which always make you feel fancy. Now, here's a little rant: I never understand why hotels don't have enough plug sockets near the bed. Always reaching, twisting, contorting… But otherwise, the room was great. Just a little annoying about the plugs, and the additional toilet would've been nice.
Internet, Internet, Internet! This is where things get interesting. They advertise Free Wi-Fi in all rooms! which is true. BUT, and it’s a big “but,” the connection sometimes felt like it was powered by a hamster running on a wheel. I mean, Internet Access - LAN was available. I tried it. Even that was a little… glacial at times. Good if you just wanted to catch up on emails. If you were planning on streaming Netflix? Prepare for buffering hell. However, the Wi-Fi in public areas was actually much better -- go figure!
Dining, Drinking, and Snacking: Okay, here’s where things get juicy. The restaurants… plural! Restaurants! They have options. And I love options. Breakfast [buffet]? Yes, please. A delicious Western breakfast with all the usual suspects, AND Asian breakfast, too! (I went for both. Don’t judge me). They had a Coffee Shop - the coffee was okay, a bit watery for my tastes. I did appreciate the bottle of water offered everywhere. The Poolside Bar was a winner. That Happy hour? Perfect. I spent a few afternoons slumped on a lounge chair, sipping something cold, watching the sunset. Pure bliss. They also had a Snack bar for quick bites. Room service [24-hour]? Now you're talking. Late-night pizza while binging movies? Yes, please.
And the food? Ah, where do I begin? A la carte in the restaurant was top-notch. The international cuisine was well-executed, and the Western cuisine was good. I heard a lot about the vegetarian restaurant, but didn't check it out. The desserts in the restaurant were… well, let's just say I may have gained a few pounds. The salad in restaurant was fresh. And the soup in restaurant was good. So, overall, a good culinary experience!
Things to Do, Ways to Relax: This is where Escape to Paradise really shines. Spa? Oh yes. I got a massage and I am not exaggerating when I say it was the best massage of my life. I’m talking “melting into a puddle of pure relaxation” level. They had a sauna, a steamroom, and a foot bath. I didn't try the body scrub or body wrap, but they sounded amazing. Swimming pool [outdoor]? Gorgeous. The pool with view was a serious Instagram moment. They have a Gym/fitness center if you are into that sort of thing. Me? I'm more into the "relaxing" side of things.
But the Fishing! This is what it's all about, right? I am not even a big fishing person. I'm more of a "sit on a dock and sip something cold" type of person. BUT! I decided to try and I am so glad I did. I mean, the name! The Unbelievable Fishing! I went with a guide. We hit the lake at dawn. The air was crisp, the water was still, and I was absolutely clueless. He showed me the knots, the lures, and, miraculously, I hooked a fish! It was a small one, but the thrill! The tug! The struggle! It was genuinely exhilarating. The guides are amazing, helpful, and patient. They know the waters like the back of their hands. And even if you don't catch anything (which is definitely a possibility, let's be honest), being out on the water, surrounded by nature, is pure magic. Just… pure magic.
Services and Conveniences: They had a concierge, which was nice. They offer cash withdrawal, a convenience store, and currency exchange. The daily housekeeping was flawless. Laundry service was convenient. I didn't need a dry cleaning service.
For the Kids: They are Family/child friendly. They have Babysitting service, and Kids facilities.
Getting Around: Airport transfer. Fantastic. Car park [free of charge]. Excellent. Okay.
The Really Random Stuff: They offer proposal spot , shrine. What?
Overall Impression:
Look, Escape to Paradise isn't perfect. It’s a little uneven in places. The Wi-Fi can be a pain. Navigation around the grounds needs work. But the staff are friendly, and the location is gorgeous. The food is good, and the spa is heavenly. And that fishing? That fishing! It was an experience. This isn't just a hotel; it's an escape (as the name says!).
The Verdict: Would I go back? Absolutely. Would I recommend it? Yes, with a few caveats. If you're looking for pure relaxation, stunning scenery, and a chance to try fishing, it's a definite winner. Just be prepared for a slightly imperfect, but utterly charming, experience.
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Here's why you NEED to book your getaway NOW:
- Unforgettable Fishing Adventures: Whether you're a seasoned angler or a complete beginner (like me!), our expert guides will have you reeling in memories. Imagine the thrill of the catch, the stunning views, and the pure joy of being on the water.
- Pure Relaxation & Pampering: Melt away stress with our world-class spa (trust me, that massage is life-changing!), soak up the sun by our gorgeous outdoor pool, or unwind in our sauna and steam room.
- Culinary Delights: From delicious Western and Asian cuisine to tempting desserts, our restaurants will tantalize your taste buds. Enjoy happy hour at our poolside bar!
- Impeccable Cleanliness & Safety: We're committed to your well-being. Rest easy knowing we prioritize your health with professional sanitization and dedicated staff trained in safety protocols.
- Convenience & Comfort: Enjoy free Wi-Fi, comfortable rooms (including options for air conditioning and private bathrooms), and convenient services.
- And So Much More: From couples' rooms and the all-important kid-friendly facilities, we have created a hotel that everyone loves.
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Saranda's Hidden Gem: Relax Mea Hotel - Unforgettable Albanian Escape
Alright, buckle up buttercups, because this isn't your grandma's perfectly-planned itinerary. This is me, trying to lasso a good time in Greenfield Valley Fishing Resort, Hua Hin/Cha-am, Thailand. Honestly? I'm already feeling a little sunburnt just thinking about it. Let’s see if I survive.
The Unofficial (and Probably Slightly Unhinged) Greenfield Valley Fishing Resort Itinerary
Day 1: Arrival & The Great Mosquito Massacre of 2024 (or, How I Rediscovered My Inner Hunter)
1:00 PM (ish): Touchdown in Bangkok. Flight was… well, let's just say the guy next to me snored with the power of a hurricane. Thank God for noise-canceling headphones and a crippling caffeine addiction. Immigration? Smooth(ish) sailing. I’m already sweating, which I'm sure is just the foreshadowing of things to come.
3:00 PM: Taxi/Uber to the resort. Praying the driver isn't a speed demon. Oh god, he IS a speed demon. Weaving through traffic like a caffeinated hummingbird. Note to self: invest in a pre-flight dose of Xanax next time.
4:30 PM: Finally! Paradise (or, at least, the entrance to it). Checked into my…bungalow? Cabin? Honestly, it looked more like a slightly glorified outhouse. But hey, clean sheets and a mosquito net are wins in my book.
5:00 PM: The Mosquito Apocalypse. I swear those little bloodsuckers were waiting for me. Seriously, I've never seen so many mosquitoes in one place. They were probably having a party, discussing the juicy tourist buffet. Armed myself with insect repellent that smelled vaguely of chemicals and blind rage. This is a battle I intend to win. I swear I had a full-blown predator moment, swatting and cursing like a pirate.
6:00 PM: Dinner at the resort restaurant. The food? Surprisingly good! Giant prawns, spicy noodles, and…wait for it…Singha beer. The perfect antidote to the mosquito-induced frenzy. The air smells divine, and the gentle breeze across the restaurant…oh god, I feel like I could actually live here!
7:30 PM: Strolled around the lake area. The fishing seemed pretty serious. A group of burly guys were there, beer in hand, serious business faces. I get the impression they were not there to make friends.
8:30 PM: Bedtime. The hum of the aircon and the slight creak of the wooden floor make me feel surprisingly, and unexpectedly, cosy.
Day 2: Fishing, Food, and the Fine Art of Existential Dread (Or, My Quest for the Elusive Giant Catfish)
7:00 AM: Woke up early, filled with a strange sense of purpose. Which is weird, because my usual purpose is "avoiding responsibility."
7:30 AM: Breakfast. Standard fare: eggs, toast, and a questionable-looking sausage. But hey, fuel is fuel. Plus, I finally discovered the real meaning of good coffee.
8:00 AM: Fishing time! The resort boasts some pretty impressive fish. I, on the other hand, have the fishing skills of a toddler. Bought some bait (which smelled suspiciously like fish-flavored cat food). Armed with a rod and a healthy dose of optimism, I stationed myself by the lake. Hours and hours of waiting. Nothing! I swear, the fish were laughing at me.
12:00 PM: Lunch. The food at the resort: amazing. The air: hot. The feeling of failure and defeat: all-consuming. I am, apparently, not a fisherman.
1:00 PM: Napping. The heat was brutal. Woke up with a mosquito bite on my forehead. Revenge on the agenda.
3:00 PM: More fishing. Still nothing. Starting to seriously question my life choices. Maybe I should have become a librarian. They seem to have a lot less to deal with, except the occasional overdue book.
6:00 PM: Back to the bungalows to freshen up for dinner.
7:00 PM: Dinner and a long walk along the beach. The air smells refreshing, and the sky is filled with a million stars. The world is breathtaking, and I'm finally feeling relaxed.
9:00 PM: Time for bed.
Day 3: Culture Shock (And the Great Laundry Debacle)
8:00 AM: Woke up. The air is still sweltering. Honestly, I'm starting to feel like a well-cooked prawn.
9:00 AM: Tried to get some laundry done. This involved a hilarious (and slightly mortifying) interaction with the resort staff, involving pointing, hand gestures, and a shared sense of bewilderment. Success! (Or, I hope so, anyway. I'm praying my favorite t-shirt doesn't come back as a miniature version of itself).
11:00 AM: Went to a local market. The smells, the colours, the sheer chaos of it all… It was a sensory overload in the best possible way. Bargained for some souvenirs, felt like a complete idiot, but secretly enjoyed it.
1:00 PM: Lunch: Pad Thai from a street vendor. Cheap, delicious, and I'm pretty sure I was halfway to getting food poisoning. But hey, live life on the edge, right?
3:00 PM: Attempted a Thai massage. "Attempted" is the operative word. The masseuse was tiny, but wielded the strength of ten oxen. I exited feeling like I had been run over by a truck, but also strangely relaxed.
5:00 PM: A last walk. I sit on the pier, watching the sun set over the water and the silhouettes of fishing boats. It's hard to believe that in a few hours I'll be back in my boring room.
7:00 PM: Farewell dinner. Reflecting on the trip. It may not have been perfect, but it was good.
9:00 PM to the next day: Travel back home.
Escape to Paradise (Maybe): FAQ About Fishing at Greenfield Valley... Yeah, It's Complicated.
So, Greenfield Valley... Is It ACTUALLY Paradise? Or What?
Okay, look, "paradise" might be pushing it a bit. I mean, the brochure definitely oversells it. Remember those sunsets? Yeah, seen 'em. Beautiful. Except the time the mosquitos ate me alive while I was trying to take a decent Insta pic. My face was, like, a lumpy canvas. But, alright, minus the insect buffet and the occasional torrential downpour (which, let's be honest, adds a certain je ne sais quoi of character), Greenfield Valley does have its moments. The fishing? Well, that brings us to the next existential question...
The Fishing. Tell Me EVERYTHING. Is the Fish Biting?
Depends. Depends entirely on the mood of the fish, the weather, and whether you’ve offended the fishing gods recently. I've had days where I felt like I could practically *breathe* on the water and a trout would leap into my boat, practically begging to be caught. (That didn't actually happen, wishful thinking, clearly). Then... there are the other days. The DAYS. Like the time I spent five hours casting, cursing, and swatting flies only to reel in… a soggy pinecone. A PINE CONE! I tell you, I almost chucked the entire rod in the water. The fish are there, supposedly. They just... don't always want to play. Persistence is key, I guess. And maybe a good therapist to deal with the inevitable rejection.
What Kind of Fish Can You Catch At Greenfield Valley?
Mostly trout. Rainbow trout, brown trout, brook trout... all the trout-ey varieties you can shake a (soggy) stick at. Occasionally, there are whispers of other things. I once heard a fisherman down the creek swore he saw a smallmouth bass. Never saw him again, so maybe he was hallucinating from sunstroke. The point is, mostly trout. Prepare for trout. Dream of trout. Become one with the trout. And bring a good trout-identification guide, because they ALL look the same when you're squinting through the glare on the water.
What Gear Do I Need to Bring?
Okay, the basics: a fishing rod (duh), reel, line, and some lures or flies. The experts will tell you exactly what kind of line and lure to use, and I'm sure they're right, but I, personally, go with whatever’s on sale. Don't judge me. Also essential: waders (if you're wading, which, unless you like sharing your water with various underwater creatures, you should), a fishing vest with way more pockets than you need (always good for storing questionable snacks and tiny bottles of sunscreen), polarized sunglasses (to, you know, actually see the fish), a hat (sun protection, and helps conceal your balding crown, ahem), and bug spray. LOTS and LOTS of bug spray. Did I mention the mosquitos?
Are there boats available?
Yes, there are. Some of them, you can rent. Some of them, you can't. I'd suggest checking beforehand so you're not standing there like a lemon. Renting a boat is a good way to get away from the crowds to get a little more breathing room and a better chance of catching a fish. Just be prepared, the "boats" may be more like glorified tubs with squeaky oars. Bring your own life vest. Trust me on this one. And maybe some Dramamine. Things get rough.
Are There Any Good Restaurants Nearby?
“Good” is subjective. There's the general store with the *questionable* hot dogs… I've never bothered to try them. There's also a diner that serves up some truly memorable (read: greasy) breakfast. I'm not saying it's Michelin-star quality, but it's fuel, and after a day of fishing, you'll take whatever you can get. Plus, the waitresses are always super chatty, so you get the latest gossip. Good for eavesdropping, bad for your diet. But let's be honest, if you're fishing at Greenfield Valley, you're probably not exactly aiming for a healthy lifestyle.
I Heard There Are Bears. Should I Be Worried?
Technically, yes. Bears exist. You're in their territory. I haven't *seen* a bear, but I've seen... evidence. Let's just say a dropped granola bar and a torn-up cooler scream "bear" to me. It's a good idea to be bear-aware. Don't leave food unattended. Make noise. Sing badly (it's good for scaring off bears and, frankly, other fishermen). Carry bear spray. And maybe don't have any overly dramatic fantasies about wrestling a grizzly for your catch. Just… don’t.
What's the Best Time of Year to Go?
That depends. Ask three different fishermen, get five different answers. But, generally... Spring. Early spring, *before* the mosquitos hatch and the sun starts frying your eyeballs. Or maybe early Fall; the leaves are gorgeous and the fish are (supposedly) more active before their hibernation. But really, any time. Except July. Seriously. The heat is unbearable. The fish are somewhere else. And the tourists? Don't even get me started. Let's just say it's a good time to stay home and consider the life choices that drove you to fishing in the first place.
Any Tips for Beginners?
Yes. So many. First, accept that you will probably not catch anything your first few times. It's okay. It's part of the process. Embrace the zen of the missed catch. Second, learn how to tie a decent knot. Seriously. That's more important than the flashiest lure. Third, be prepared for the elements. The weather in Greenfield Valley does what it wants. And finally, don't be afraid to ask for help. Even crusty, weathered fishermen secretly love to share their secrets. Or, you know, just make friendly conversation. You're already out there in nature, and it's good to connect with someone else who is too. Okay, maybe the secret is to be patient and to just accept that the day will start with the sun, end with the sunset, and the memory of your fishing day willHotel For Travelers
